Town Officials Looking To Add ‘Piss Free’ Pool To Local Water Park

ATLANTA, GEORGIA — Town officials are looking to add a piss free pool to their local water park and most residents couldn’t be more excited about the idea!

We have long been swimming in that pissy piss pool downtown. Every summer me and my family roll up to the pool smelling fresh and we leave smelling like piss. When you have a public pool filled with hundreds of kids, you know there be piss in them waters. This new piss free pool should be awesome and piss free!

We reached out to town official Lance Kramer about the new pool and how they intend to keep it piss free.

Well, we are going to warn people that if they piss in the new piss free pool, they are banned for life. Even one little tinkle will get you banned. It gets hot here in Atlanta and people can’t afford to just get banned from the public pool. We are also going to instill fear into the people, because fear motivates. There will be signs that tell guests that the pool water will turn red if you piss in it and that dye can cause a severe rash, similar to herpes. So we are pretty certain ain’t nobody going to be pissing in the piss free pool.

When the town council met to discuss the notion of a piss free pool, there was one resident, only one, that had an issue with the piss free pool idea.

I just don’t get it. How are we going to determine who gets to use the piss free pool and who gets to use the piss filled pool? Sounds like it’s going to be a status thing. You got money, you get piss free. You broke, you and your family be swimming in piss. I just don’t like it. Why can’t we all just swim in the same big piss pool and call it good?

The town council plans to move forward will the appropriate permits in order to install the new piss free pool.