Mattel Introduces New Teeter Totter For Thrill Seeking Toddlers

In an effort to appeal to more toddlers, famed toy company Mattel has released the ‘Toddler Totter’, a massive teeter totter for thrill seeking toddlers.

We get a lot of customer complaints from parents that wish we created toys that are geared towards their thrill seeking children. So, we finally decided to get into the thrill seeking toddler market. With that said, the Toddler Totter is one hell of a bad ass toy. It’s a little pricey though, costing $6500 big ones. It also takes about 12 people and 30-hours to construct. But, once it’s up and running – kids can push off the ground and soar up to 95 feet in the air! We have only sold a few units thus far, but reviews have been excellent! And yes, we do make parents who purchase the Toddler Totter, sign a waiver, removing Mattel from all liability if injury should occur. I mean, lets be real…these are little kids flying nearly 100 fucking feet in the air, shit can happen. • CEO Ynon Kreiz, Mattel