Judge Presiding Over Johnny Depp Case Confused By Lack Of Cocaine Trafficking Evidence

by Bavocado

Los Angeles, California — The Judge presiding over the highly popular Johnny Depp and Amber Heard court case doesn’t understand why there is such a lack of evidence in regards to cocaine smuggling.

Those in attendance of the Johnny Depp vs. Amber Heard case have stated that presiding Judge Penney Azcarate has appeared rather confused on more than one occasion during since the beginning of the trial. Often times, muttering verbiage about blow and flights to Columbia under her breath while sitting at on the bench.

We were able to reach out for comment to a few individuals who have been in the courtroom since day one of the trial, their identities have been changed for their protection.

On the very first day of the trial, I was sitting in the front row…I mean the fourth row…yea the fourth row…and the judge looked directly at Johnny Depp and said in a whisper, ‘I can’t believe this guy smuggled so much cocaine into America, we are going to surely nail him.’ – Fourth row spectator 


At one point the judge asked for both sides of council to approach the bench, this was like day 4 of the trial — and the entire courtroom heard her ask both lawyers where all the cocaine trafficking evidence was? I think she said something like, ‘I’m not sure what this Amber Heard lady has to do with this trial, but where in the hell is all of the cocaine trafficking evidence? This man is one of the most well known drug traffickers in the world – you would think you would have some fucking evidence of this before entering my courtroom.’ – Court Attendee 


During a recess, the judge dead ass looked Depp in the face and said that he should have just stuck to selling marijuana on the beaches of Cali and that she was also sorry to hear about his fathers passing. This lady really think she’s in a movie man…



This judge is straight whack brah…she thinks that Depp is a drug smuggler because he starred in that movie ‘Blow’. What’s next…she going to accuse the dude of stealing some treasure from her chambers? Naw man…this chick whacked out. – Court Attendee